Don’t overlook small family matters and don’t expect God to repair that what you ignore. A family unit that does not work in agreement or unity will crumble apart, and it does not matter whether families have a practical or biblical perception of marriage.
A friend who named and labeled her parents “that biological pair” was born in a family that she and her siblings were mistreated. “That biological pair,” as she would say, were not parents but slave owners. Manipulation, favoritism, and child abuse was common in their home. It was obvious her parents were in agreement how they wanted to discipline and raise their children.
When these children became adults, they struggled with mental illnesses which two of her siblings committed suicide. The siblings who are living struggle with depression, anxiety, anger, and they have no contact with one another. Her family was not raised according to biblical principles.
A husband and wife were in agreement how their children should be discipline, but they had different characteristics. The husband was strong-willed and vibrant. The wife was timid and submissive. They were of two different backgrounds. The wife was raised by a single mother and the husband was raised in a two parent home. The husband was a few years older than his wife.
When the wife was overwhelmed with her husband’s strong-willed and vibrant behaviors, she confided with her children the anger she had toward their father. The seed of discord was planted during early childhood, and as adults some have animosity toward the father, the mother, or both parents. This family struggles with mental illness, but are not aware. This family was raised, to the best of the parent’s knowledge, according to biblical principles.
Jesus was raised in a home that his father and mother knew His purpose and though they were vested in Him they did not understand His every move.
During a time when He was in Capernaum, a group of folks formed a crowd against Him, they were upset with Him as he had performed a miracle on the Sabbath, which was considered a day of rest and against Jewish customs. When Jesus family learns the crowd was against Him, they went to take custody of Him, as they believed the rumors the Scribes were spreading that he was possessed by “Beezebul” (Satan), and that “he was driving out demons by the power of the rulers of the demons.” His family thought he was out of His mind.
When Jesus was confronted about what the Scribes were spreading, He spoke these words in a parable, “… if a house is divided against itself, that house cannot not stand,” (Mark 3:25). Jesus used this analogy to indicate what they were implying did not make sense. How can you say that I am driving out demons by the power of the ruler of demons, if that be the case Satan is working against Satan, and a family that works against it-self will not stand.
Whether you are in a family like the first scenario that the parents and children were divided, or the second scenario a husband and wife were divided, or the third scenario like Jesus whose parents knew His purpose but allowed opinions of others to divide the family, the end result of a divided family is chaotic.
The separation of family is more prevalent today than yester-years. The father blames the mother or vice-versa, and rarely but it does happen, the children blame the father, mother, or both. Everybody wants to blame another rather than take individual responsibility.
Paul spoke these words about the responsibility of each family member, “Wives, be subject to your husband [out of respect for their position as protector, and their accountability to God], as is proper and fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives [with an affectionate, sympathetic selfless love that always seeks the best for them] and do not be embittered or resentful toward them [because of the responsibilities of marriage]. Children obey your parents [as God’s representatives] in all things, for this [attitude of respect and obedience] is well-pleasing to the Lord [and will bring you God’s promised blessing],” (Colossians 3:18-20)…key words, accountability, affection, selfless, love, obedience…not easy to do, but is doable. It takes a family unit working together.
The law or constitution of marriage was established based on biblical principles. So it does not matter whether your marriage union is practical, biblical or both, for sure a family that is divided within will crumble.